Twisted tales from the tabloids...

We take a bit of a battering in the papers this morning after the 2-0 defeat to Roman FC at Shit Bridge yesterday. Despite a much improved performance after the capitulation against the Mancs, the tabloids give us a good kicking, with Chelsea fan Rob Beasley’s report in the Sun about as bad and biased as it gets.
Here is a sample of his balanced piece on the game: There’s only one Didier Drogba, one England captain, one team in London… and there’s only one team top of the league, having a laugh. Celebrating Chelsea fans belted out that message loud and clear at Stamford Bridge last night. But the buoyant Blues crowd missed one out. There’s also only one team that can stop them taking the title – the usual suspects Manchester United. Arsenal are out of it.
Out of it we may be and Beasley, who usually makes things up for the News of the World, must have been out of it too based on his intro. Twot. I didn’t see any ‘celebrating Chelsea fans’ and given that the ground was silent apart from us lot I fail to see what message was ‘belted out’. Twot.
John Cross in the Mirror is just as twisted. He writes: Not even blinkered Arsene Wenger could deny Didier Drogba deserved the man-of-the-match champagne. In fact, the Arsenal manager may as well raise the white flag and not bother turning up the next time Drogba is in Chelsea’s starting line-up.
Incredibly, Wenger said Drogba did not do very much when Chelsea beat Arsenal at the Emirates in November. Apart from score twice and bully Arsenal into submission.
Fast forward two months and it was a different venue but same old story. Drogba scored twice, was a lick of paint away from a hat-trick and put in a performance which typified the gulf in class between the two clubs. Chelsea were powerful, strong and dominant. Arsenal lightweight, disappointing and toothless up front. Twot.
Fat Sam (Martin Samuel not Allardyce), writing in the Mail, pens this: Here comes another one, just like the other one. Cast your minds back to November when Chelsea went to Arsenal. Yes? Well, it was like this. Didier Drogba unstoppable, Chelsea irresistible, Arsene Wenger certifiable.
Arsenal had 70 per cent of possession, he claimed. They were always on the front foot and in the game, apparently. It was not an exhibition of football from Chelsea. Not in the purest sense, maybe.
Not in terms of beauty for its sake, but from the seventh minute, when Chelsea scored, there was only going to be one winner and Wenger is in denial if he cannot see that. Arsenal had more of the ball – 58 per cent, actually – but Chelsea had the game, and their manager, Carlo Ancelotti, had the more incisive analysis. Twot.
Back to the Sun and they claim Marouane Chamakh has hinted he would choose a move to Arsenal over Liverpool. The Bordeaux striker is free at the end of the season but, despite reports suggesting he has agreed a deal with Rafa Benitez’s Reds, the Morocco international admitted he would prefer to go to the Gunners.
He said: “My choice is to join a Premier League club. If I had a choice, I would go to Arsenal. Bordeaux gave me a lot. I will soon clarify things so the club can prepare my successor.”
Could have done with him up front yeserday. Right, where are the Anadin?

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