Rooney or loft lights?

I have been thinking about the debate that always starts during an international break – the perennial club versus country argument.
There can be little doubt that supporters of Arsenal and other top premier league teams can’t get too excited about international football.
Whilst supporters of clubs from the lower divisions can be fanatical about their country’s performances and results, the rest of us don’t seem to give a monkey’s arse.
Why is this I wonder?
It was a funny day yesterday with both the England Rugby and England Football teams in action live on the tele. How many of you were like me come 3 o’clock – putting up loft lights or something equally mundane – instead of sitting watching our ‘heroes’ battling it out against the football might of Estonia?
And yet how many of you were sitting glued and nervous watching another brilliant game of Rugby later on? How can I get worked up over a game I don’t really understand and have never seen played in the flesh, when the love of my life – football – was being played by my beloved country and I couldn’t give a shit about the performance or the result?
Don’t get me wrong, I have been in a pub on many occasions like the rest of you watching a critical World or European Nations Cup match involving England – cheering and shouting – and then feeling absolutely gutted when we were beaten – again – on penalties – again.
So why don’t I give a toss at the moment?
Well I think there are a number of reasons. Firstly there is the crap timing of these matches, interrupting the league games just when things are beginning to take shape. Secondly getting yourself up for a game against rubbish opposition is not quite the same as for a vital World Cup semi-final. However I think the main reason might just be psychological.
I could never be a true gooner if I didn’t hate the Spuds, ManUre, the Chavs, ‘ammers, Toons and all the other teams that stand in the way of us winning back our title. That means of course hating their managers, their chairmen and most of all their players. How can I therefore watch England and not want players like Cashley arseface Cole, Lardy Lampard and Rolypoly Robinson to play utter crap and to preferably break a leg? How can I cheer them and want them to play well for goodness sake? Sorry, no can do.
It might be slightly different during the summer after the season is over and peace amongst supporters once more presides for a short month or two, but at the moment I just can’t be arsed with internationals. As I never go to or watch a club Rugby match, I can’t possibly hate any of England’s Rugby players and can therefore get passionate and patriotic about them. Know what I mean?
So roll on Saturday when we can scream and take the piss out of Anelka and the rest of the Bolton players – whatever nationality they may be.

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